1. Be Unprepared: Show up to class without your work, camera, tape recorder or notebook. Don’t finish interviews. Never take stories home to work on, or leave them there if you do.
2. Don’t Be A Team Player: When you are done with your work, play on the computer. Don’t volunteer for assignments. Don’t ask “who needs help?” Always argue with others in class. Make sure that you keep your friends from finishing their work too. Don’t clean up after yourself. Never come to meetings, nothing important happens there anyway.
3. Don’t Be Self-Reliant: Ask for help on everything. Never do something without at least one friend along for help, preferably two. Don’t learn how to use the computers or cameras. Always expect someone else to fix it.
4. Be Rude: Never say please or thank you. Always take the last goodie during parties and three times as much food as anyone else.
5. Be A Gossip: Make sure that everyone knows the latest rumor. Keep tabs on everyone’s significant others. Spread as much dirt as you can. Make it up, when you can’t find out anything good.
6. Be Unhealthy: Don’t wash your hands. Don’t cover your mouth when you sneeze. Spread germs and illness whenever you are sick. Make sure you come to school when you feel your worst.
7. Be The Bull: Make sure you push and shove. Be the first one out of the room. Be the loudest one in the room. Make sure that no one else can ever do their work because you are loud enough.
8. Keep Your Cell Phone Always On: Make sure that you are always talking on your cell. Never put it on vibrate or turn off the ringer. Take calls in the middle of conversations. Check your text messages while people are talking to you.
9. Hog The Computer: Make sure you open as many applications as you can. Always have at least four different web sites open. Print ten times as many copies as you need.
10. Be a Whiner: Complain about everything. Never let a chance go by to roll your eyes or make an unkind comment. Do it under your breath, but loud enough so they can hear it.
11. Make Lots of Mistakes: Not accidents, make sure you never use spell check or look anything up to make sure it is correct. Who cares anyway?
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